Outside the Box: The Most Meaningful Gift That Changed My Perspective

The most meaningful gifts aren't always what you expect. An honest mistake over a Gold Touch Lamp and the lore of famed racing star Jeff Gordon taught writer Brock Pickett a powerful lesson about gift-giving etiquette and changing perspective.

My wife and I have been happily married for just under 25 years. We were attending high school when we started dating. From day one, her parents have been involved and encouraging and supportive, and continue to be so to this day. Over the years, we have come to know one another in terms of the gifts we buy. We’ve settled into a rhythm that works for all of us. 

While I was still young, not to mention naive and arrogant, our gift-giving was not so settled. Before I get to that, there are two things you must know. First, back in the day, I was a huge racing fan, and my favorite driver was Jeff Gordon, a fandom I shared with my at-the-time girlfriend’s parents. The second thing to know is that often, my family reused boxes when wrapping gifts. Our family, never hurting for sarcasm, often exclaimed on a Christmas morning, “Oh wow, another pair of the same shoes I have!” or “I’ve always wanted a box of tissues!” It was all part of the gift-giving experience. 

On that fateful evening right before Christmas while my wife and I were still in high school and while Jeff was still tearing up the track, the time had come for me to exchange gifts with her family. The gift from her parents was placed on my lap: a large box covered in bright wrapping. I anticipated some wonderful surprise but had no idea what it could be. I tugged at the paper which revealed writing printed directly on the side of the cardboard box. There, written in the ubiquitous black ink block lettering of a generic production box was printed 

GOLD TOUCH LAMP WITH 6-PANEL GLASS SHADE. QUANTITY: 1 

I was unfazed. Makes sense they would reuse a box just like my family does. Obviously, what I would find once I opened the box was going to be so much cooler than a gold lamp with a glass shade. Who would ever give something like that to a teenage boy? In a voice not just dripping, but drenched in sarcasm, I leaned over to my girlfriend, her parents looking on, and declared in a boisterous voice what should have been a completely safe joke, “Ohhh, look! It’s a gold touch lamp with glass shade!” 

You know what happened next. 

I opened the box and removed the top piece of form-fitted styrofoam to reveal a picture of none other than everyone’s favorite stock car champion, Jeff Gordon, printed on a small glass panel. My pulse quickened, the realization unfolding in slow motion: “Ohhh nooo! What have I done?!” My stomach sank further with each piece I unwrapped—the five companions to the glass panel, the shade into which they would all be assembled, and finally the shiny gold lamp base. 

Jeff was my only hope, so I blurted some incoherent thing, as if imploring his help, “Wow! I never imagined it would be his picture on the lamp! That’s so cool!” It was too late — going back was not an option. I could barely make eye contact with anyone in the room, let alone say thank you. For the sake of a joke, I had hurt their feelings, and I was devastated. Thankfully, my in-laws are gracious and of good humor, and we were able to overcome the embarrassment 

I can’t say I ever loved that lamp; it really wasn’t my style. But for several years, it held a place of honor in my bedroom, then in our home when my wife and I were married. 

I no longer watch racing, and the lamp is long gone, but the lesson remains: when I smugly assume I know exactly what’s going on, I close myself off to the gift of surprise — and the joy of discovering something new, no matter what it’s wrapped in.

Brock Pickett is a writer, spiritual director, and lifelong learner who finds meaning in life’s small surprises. He lives in Indiana with his wife of nearly 25 years, their family, and a steady supply of reused gift boxes.